The Grip of Patterns
Behavior patterns usually give stability and efficiency to our lives. We eat a particular diet, we have patterned jobs, and we count on our political and social network, our friends and mate for their stability.
While many behavior patterns are good, others can be destructive to our body, to our soul, and to our success in life. We may feel caught within our own personality and feel almost unable to grow. We may feel frustrated by our constant weaknesses. We may smoke, or drink, or have other habits which are basically suicidal. Or we may be constantly nervous. We may feel like the victim of fears and irrational phobias (such as the fear of heights).
Or we may be frustrated by the typical ways we deal with situations and treat other people. We may react all too often with anger to others, or be "controlling", or timid, or...you fill in the blank, because you know your own personality.
The Causes of Behavior Patterns
It might be said that there are three causes to any or all of our behavior patterns (outside of simple instinct).
The Click Into Joy! Personal Change Method may not change patterns caused by numbers one and two above. We might recommend religion, therapy, alternative healing practices, or meditation to have any effect on these.
But changing negative behavior patterns caused by habit is what the Click Into Joy! method was designed for. And when push comes to shove, it is amazing how many of our negative patterns are the result of habitually inappropriate responses to situations which are not in themselves identical to the one or ones which started the whole cycle.
Let us give some examples. Obviously, using tobacco or over-eating, or going on purchasing binges, as responses to stressful situations are inappropriate, self-defeating habits. But many of our negative personality patterns can also be related to inappropriate habits.
Let's say many years ago our father hit us in anger--maybe more than once. We were intensely afraid--we needed to defend ourselves, to shut down, to get out of his way. This response may have been appropriate, but if because of that instance we develop a fear of all men, we may be emotionally crippled for the rest of our lives. Or, from the same situation, we may develop a general sense of worthlessness, or a general sense of shyness. Our habitual response now becomes generally inappropriate.
Or let us say that in our early life, there was continual anger shown in our family, caused by one or several "bent" family members. Perhaps we ourselves, following this pattern, vent our anger too loosely on others. That too-loose venting may be seen as a habit of the nervous system.
Or perhaps we were traumatically victimized in our childhood, and we have a tremendous amount of rage that keeps coming out at inappropriate times on unsuspecting individuals, and which gets in the way of our own success in life. The actual causative events are over, yet we carry a pattern within ourselves. We are angry at everything.
The problem is, that many of these habits run extremely deep, are self-perpetuating, and are actually part of the mind. If we logically decide to change, that mental decision will probably have very little effect on our patterns of action--or at least that change will take a substantial, continuous amount of mental energy to take effect. In the long run, the mind has a hard time changing itself.
How the Click Into Joy! Method
Works to Change Negative Habits
The Click Into Joy! Method works because of two factors.
Firstly, the physical presence--on our body--of the Power Counter (see the detailed introduction) tends to remind us that we have an actual technique to use when we face (however familiar) situations of stress and discomfort.
And secondly, the "relaxation events" (again, see the detailed introduction for an explanation) which are triggered by use of the method, involve the whole body, including the "heart". The sense of joy which is tends to follow the letting go of anxiety, (that is, with relaxation events) tends to "reset" our nervous systems into more appropriate, more socially natural reactions to individual situations.
These appropriate reactions are quite soon recognized by the mind as better, more joy-and-success-producing behaviors. Over a relatively short period of time, real changes can take place in one's behavior and actual nervous system.
For details on the potential effect of the Click Into Joy! Personal Change Method on many less-than-comfortable behavior patterns, please return to our main page and take your choice of topics on the "results" side.
(As authors, we think it is a bit odd that this rather long page introducing negative behavior patterns is climaxed in just three short "solution" paragraphs, but this brevity is itself a commentary on the simplicity, naturalness and depth of the Method.)
|The first cause is the strengths, tendencies and weaknesses of the particular nervous system that we born with--the strengths and weakness of the "package" which God gave us.|
|The second cause of our behavior patterns is all of the experiences we have ever had, including those involving our parents, our childhood, our peers, etc.|
|The third cause of our behavior patterns is simply habit.|